Tracey O'Callaghan (part 1)

Speaker 1 00:02

This is a Vision Australia radio podcast.

Speaker 2 00:19

On Vision Australia Radio, welcome to our conversations on the work and experiences of emerging writers. I'm Kate Cooper and our guest on today's program is Tracy O 'Callaghan, writer, poet, storyteller, word weaver, {?beautiful term], spoken word performer and fitness instructor. Tracy has performed both competitively and as feature poet for spoken word events around Adelaide and internationally. Since 2018 she's been a state and national poetry slam finalist and was state champion in 2021.

Tracey's website has the fabulous title The Queen of Sass and includes video recordings of Tracey's performances which our listeners can access. Tracy's collection of poems titled Brains, Balls and Banta was published in 2023. In May 2024 Tracy performs some of her poetry at the inaugural Poetry at the Port event which is being held on the second Thursday of each month at Millage's Distillery in Port Adelaide and is where we caught up.
Welcome to the program Tracey. 

Speaker 3

Hi Kate, thank you for having me. 

Speaker 2

As we mentioned in the introduction, you're a spoken word poet who performs at poetry events around Adelaide and internationally. Looking at your poetry CV, you've taken part in more than 50 events in five years. What inspired you to first start performing your poetry at spoken word events?

Speaker 3 02:00

Well, Kate, I like to set myself challenges that catapult me out of my comfort zone. And I'd watched Shane Koisan's poem called To This Day. And it resonated with me, inspiring me to put my experiences into words of what school life was like for me. His work is amazing. I also accidentally came across a buttoned paltry spoken word piece performed by three young girls. The poem's title was The Rape Poem. I thought my writing was similar, passionate, honest, and raw. So I started writing a little differently. I was aware of spoken word essay and the competitions that they ran each winter. And it took three years for me to gain the courage to enter a winter heat at the State Library.

I had three friends there for support and the whole experience was horrific. My nerves took a pounding and I tripped up on the stage with the one step and I wore glasses and read off a piece of paper and I shook the whole time. At least I didn't vomit or pass out. And it was Daniel from Spoken Word Essay who encouraged me to enter the other heats. So I did. And I was very lucky to receive second place in the fourth heat. This gave me a spot at the spoken word slam finals for SA 2018. And that was the beginning of my spoken word journey.

Speaker 2 03:19

We should do a shout out to Spoken Word SA. We've spoken with Sarah Jane from Spoken Word SA before on this program, but many of our guests have cited them as a real inspiration and support for their work. Tracy, you said before about it being really nerve -wracking, about starting to perform poetry in public, and you write about this on your website as well. So what experiences can you share about how you prepare now for a performance to warm up your voice and also manage any feelings of nervousness?

Speaker 3 03:57

I use quite a few different techniques, but breathing techniques is one of them. I will massage the side of my jaws because they'll get really, really tight because I clench my teeth. I cannot sit still pre-performance. I pace and I take myself off into another zone or an area. I listen to motivational sections of paltry music also, and I tell my nerves and excitement to meet in the middle and behave. I also attach no outcome to the end result now. I step up to the mic each time with the aim to give my poems the respect they deserve. As my name is called out, I take myself back to what motivated me to write the poem in the first place.

Speaker 2 04:40

Tracey, at the Poetry at the Port event in May 2024, you performed your poetry without any notes. How hard is it to remember your poems for a performance and to keep the beat going? How do you manage it so effectively because it was really powerful the way you did it there?

Speaker 3 04:59

Well thank you Kate. I work very hard. I sometimes look at a new poem that I've written and going there is no way on earth I'm going to remember that. So I practice non-stop until I get it right. I print off the poem and blue tack it in my car and practice and critique and make changes to the poem with the red light. I learn the first stanza and once I remember that one I move on to the next one. And then there is the timing when you enter comps. There is a two minute limit for each poem, so I aim for 10 seconds off two minutes. I performed the poems in front of my family and friends to practice when I am competing and they're pretty critical of some of them but it's just continued practice. I wake up and I say the poems are getting the car, I say the poem in the shower I've got the poems. It's, repetitious is the key and perfecting it. Thanks for watching!

Speaker 2 05:49

Brilliant. Tracy, would you perform one of your poems for us now? 

Speaker 3 05:55

I would love to. Kate, the poem I'm going to do is called Wild Child. 

They wanted a flat lining spread thin. They invited her in then shut her out. They wanted her beneath them trodden into the ground kissing the dirt where she belonged. They wanted a tainted, taunted, defeated eyes hidden beneath long lashes with her head hung low. They wanted her a dribbling mess for a second guess. They were merciless. They wanted a beaten, broken, a clone cut from cloth they created. They wanted a scarred, scared, barred, left free, fallen, whiplash, smacks her against her back as she fell through the cracks. Whelp marks on young's skin as she caught on the edges of not quite fitting in.
They wanted her black cross on forehead marked. They wanted her included, excluded, trapped. 

Nervenden's rubber band tight across small chest, her bulletproof vest. They wanted her in knots off cuter, odd, not quite right. They wanted her to snap back, bite, react. They wanted to reach inside her throat, grab her last breath. If only they knew this wild child welcomed the thought of death. They wanted a deer like caught in headlights. They wanted a cardboard cut out paper doll press. They wanted her pressed, stressed, ignored. They wanted to pick at her like a smorgasbord until only the dregs were left. They wanted her to believe she didn't belong in any place that her birth was a mistake. They wanted her to fall apart at the seams fold into herself until she disappeared. Broken, puzzle pieces turning into dust. They wanted her gone. Little did they know she'd already left.

Speaker 2 08:00

Tracy, that's an incredibly powerful poem and your delivery, the pacing, the rhymes that come within the poem, but also at the end. It's fantastic to listen to. Thank you. 

Speaker 3

Thank you, Kate. It means a lot to me.

Speaker 2 08:16

Thank you. And we mentioned in the introduction that you've been a state and national poetry slam finalist and you were state champion here in South Australia in 2021. Congratulations. And at a national level, you were also a finalist in 2021 and 2022. Would you tell us more about what it's like to take part in the state competition and then also about your experiences taking part in the national finals, which are held in the Sydney Opera House?

Speaker 3 08:48

Thank you. Look, the state finals have been an amazing experience for me because you get to meet different people and sometimes the same people make it to the state final each year. They were exciting, nerve-wracking, but each time was just brilliant. The Goodwood Institute, where they're all held, is a lovely venue where the SA finalists all meet. We meet and we all get together and have somebody else supporting us well and giving us techniques pre-performance.

And it's really great to hear all the different poets perform. Nerve-wracking, as I said, because we stay behind the curtain and our names picked out of a hat by the audience and yes, so each time one finishes, we are sitting there waiting. I don't sit actually, I pace. But anyway, Sydney Opera House to me was a completely different experience, a little overwhelming, but a memory that I'll always cherish. And once again, I met many different creative artists and poets over there.

Speaker 2 09:51

How many people are there at Sydney Opera House? So you're getting up, you're facing an audience that's bigger than the Goodwood Theatre. How many people are you standing in front of?

Speaker 3 10:00

It was approximately 500 people, and once again your name was called out of the hat and we were sitting out in the audience and there were 16 poets and I was called out number 14 so it was very nerve-wracking.

Speaker 2 10:15

My goodness... but a worthwhile experience.

Speaker 3 10:18

Oh, amazing. And once, just so many people that you'd seen from other parts of Australia who would come up to you and introduce themselves, it was really good to put people's faces to names.

Speaker 2 10:29

And we'll talk later in the program about the community of spoken word poets here in South Australia, but it sounds like the community actually operates at a national level as well. 

Speaker 3

It certainly does.

Speaker 2 10:41

And keeping on the subject of poetry slams, you were the winner of the spoken word essay, Be Natural slam in 2021 and 2022, and winner of the spoken word essay Animal Slam in 2022. How did the Be Natural and Animal Slams differ from the state and national poetry slams?

Speaker 3 11:04

OK, definitely less pressure. And if I could add to it, a little bit of fun - which if Kami was sitting here from spoken word essay, he'd go, Yeah, no, I don't have fun when I perform in regards to me because of my nerves. But it was a bit more relaxed for me. The natural slams were a great experience because one poem was about the love of the sea and what we do and the damage to it... and the second poem that I performed for the Nature Slam was about how we are cutting down all the trees and putting boring two-storey houses up.
And that was quite an experience for me. And the Animal Slam was another great fun one that Spoken Word Essay put together for something different, like pre-winter spoken word slam.

Speaker 2 11:54

And these are annual slams as well as the state poetry slams.

Speaker 3 12:00

Spoken word essay will usually have a different theme each year, but the B Natural Slam has been on what I know of three years. The Animal Slam was a one-off and there was something else they did in 2023, I can't remember. But they're always coming up with great new ideas.

Speaker 2 12:19

Fantastic, we'll have to keep an ear out for those. On Vision Australia Radio, you're listening to our conversation program Emerging Writers. Our guest today is Tracey O 'Callaghan, writer, poet, storyteller, word weaver, spoken word performer and fitness instructor. Tracey, would you perform another of your spoken word poems for us?

Speaker 3 12:49

So the poem that I'm going to perform now is a poem that I wrote nine days before the state final for 2022 and I actually performed it in the state final and drew second place. So it is called Cardboard Box.

He filled his fist with I love yous. Delivered them quick. Hit after hit after hit. They covered the bruises on her face with makeup like thick icing on a cake. Only trouble is, she's never going to wake. They slip lifeless limbs into a favorite dress. Hair spray on curls that were always a mess. Slide the shutters down on the windows to her soul. Ruby red slashes on nails. Hands together on her chest. This is the place she came to rest. Pale pink on lips that would no longer speak. They dare to say women who stay in the abuse are incredibly weak. If only they knew. He took the children away. She ate fear for breakfast most of her days. If only they'd seen the bruises she hid. His hand tight on her arm. 

Answering for her he knew how to charm. If only they knew what he said. When she refused her duties in the marital bed. Still tip pressed into her head. Bang bang. Long lines. Slow steps. They've come to show their respect. Now they're all talking about the years of neglect. She's no longer running. She's no longer scared. Look at the mourners showing they cared. Underneath she's still broken. Black and blue. The grief, the guilt, it's gonna break quite a few. How many more will we bury? Cremate. Cry rivers of tears for all the two lates. For all of these women who are nowhere near their use-by date.

Speaker 2 15:24

Thank you, Tracey. That's a very hard-hitting and very necessary poem. And for our listeners, if this has raised any issues for you or anyone you know, call 1-800-RESPECT. That's 1-800-737-732... or Lifeline on 131114.

Tracy, you mentioned Kami before, a co-founder of Spoken Word Essay, who writes of your published collection of poems titled Brains, Balls and Banter - great title - that to see and hear Tracy O 'Callaghan live is to feel the drive and passion she brings to her art. She commands your attention and draws you into her world where she spits the words out as if they are burning inside her and need no have to be released. It's been one of life's pleasures to watch Tracy develop her poetry, her performance skills and fine-tune her craft since she first nervously stepped onto the stage to become the firebrand she is today. If you haven't yet heard her perform, I urge you to correct that mistake. Until then, this collection will give you just a hint of the zeal and energy she brings. Hers is a voice that you know will still be heard in years to come.

And as I read these poems, I once again feel that passion. Now it's your turn. And I certainly concur with Kami about that. Tracy, would you tell us about the process of putting together your poetry collection for publication and what you learnt from that process?

Speaker 3 17:19

Well, it was a process. The poems that I put together for the first draft of the book was just a lot that I had performed and got feedback from and dunno, did all very well in the comps with. So I formatted the first draft and sent it off to my person who was going to edit, Steve Evans, and he was quite impressed with the poems and the choice and the layout with only a couple of changes, which I was waiting for a whole spin around of everything. So that was, that was fantastic. That was a bonus. So that was the first part. So then after he's sent it all back and I needed to make quite a few small changes, which definitely made the poems fall better on the pages and he also encouraged me to go further with a couple of the poems that I could do more with, which I did.

I found it quite a struggle to get people to be involved, asking for reviews and then people would commit and then didn't commit. And that was just their hurdles you're going to get in any book. So I regrouped, got a bit overwhelmed and went back in again and just had the support, which was profoundly humbling. And that was of Steve Evans as my editor. Rob Decock was my typesetter, an absolute saint and legend. He was instrumental with the ideas of how to improve the intro and ending and all aspects of the book, cover front and back. And a few times or two I felt like thrown in the tower, but of course I didn't. 

And then you had Jack Vol and Gillespie. He was another complete stranger through a friend that read the book and reviewed it. And so at the end it was quite easy, it just fell into place. I got the venue that I wanted. I got a local Griffin Press to put the book together and it just, it worked.

Speaker 2 19:19

Fantastic, and I really loved reading your book. I think it's a great title. As I said before, if our listeners want to get hold of a copy, how can they do that?

Speaker 3 19:30

They can contact me through my website, which is www.thequeenofsass.com.au ... With the book, there is a couple, I think maybe one left in Dymocks.

Speaker 2 19:45

Sounds great, and we'll come back to your website a little bit later on. Tracy I have another question for you that I've been asking guests on this program. How do you go about creating your works? Do you have a favorite place where you like to write? Does it vary?

Speaker 3 20:02

I write anywhere. I have taken over the whole house as I told the house that I am a creative arts person. Every space is literally mine to have books, pens and fluro markers at. I'm a bit naughty like that.

Speaker 3 20:19

But I do look, I write in the bed. I get, I quite like getting back into bed with a coffee and the laptop. I sometimes have to pull the car over and write or I record verbal runs. I call a verbal run where I'm just driving along, I get an idea in my head and I record it so I don't lose it. Because it could be the possibility of a great poem and a lot of those times they have been possibilities. I create the first draft and then due to I have that experience and background of doing spoken word performance poetry, I say it out loud so I can hear how it falls into the air, into the space and if something doesn't sound right I'm going oh that's pretty crap so I'll circle that.

And then there's times I will do the first draft and it will break me so I know I'm on a bit of a winner. I'm pretty brutal with my critiquing. I make changes at the second draft, date and time sometimes when I'm critiquing I can have six different times on that same day. I keep all my draft so I can look back at the process. I am a bit of a perfectionist. I have, as I said, taken over the house. I have a beautiful timber riding desk that I never sit at and write. It's filled with my riding gear so I've taken over the end of the kitchen table as well. So that's how I do it. I just make sure I record everything verbally and don't...

Speaker 2 21:47

Brilliant. I like that idea of the house essentially being an extended writing room. Yes, everywhere. Do you like writing outdoors as well? You mentioned about in your car but you include beautiful everyday observations in your poem so do you sometimes just sit outside and then it all comes to you?

Speaker 3 22:09

Yes, I do. Sometimes I will actually write and not do other stuff in the house, the boring stuff like housework. I will go down to the beach and sit on the beach or even sit in the car if it's really windy weather because I love that and the waves are really rough and I'll sit right there or I'll go and sit under trees. I love the tree area in botanical gardens near the zoo. I lay under the trees so I get inspired by that. I like to be right next to nature.

Speaker 2 22:40

And Tracey, you've got a recording on your website of the launch of your book with you performing some of your poems. Would you tell us about that and also give us your web address again?

Speaker 3 22:52

Okay, so the performance is up there on the website and the website is, again, thequeenofsass.com.au ... The performance goes about 45 minutes of all the poems and the intros to the poems with a guest appearance by Avalanche where we did a poem duet, which was brilliant. So if you'd like to have a look at that, go to my websites where you can order my book, have a look at some of my performances, hear my performances and see if you like them or not.

Speaker 2 23:23

That's brilliant, thank you so much Tracey. Tracey, would you perform another of your spoken word poems for us?

Speaker 3 23:30

Certainly will Kate, this one is For Us Women and Girls. 

I've raised a daughter. It wasn't a party. When she lets rip, there's eye rollin', head rollin', she's like a fox terrier's knocked back a red bull. Her laser death stare, you cannot compare. I've raised a daughter. And I did not teach myself to feel fear for her, but it shimmied along the edge of her childhood. And me, lioness, pacing around the perimeter of her life, knowing some boys will be raised to believe women are beneath them. So I teach my daughter to take a stand in a world where those boys become men who live in prints of fists, walk away with a slap on the wrists. I'll teach my daughter that No is a complete sentence, that her body is hers to own, not theirs.

And then unwelcome hand prints are not welcome, and invites will be rare. So I teach my daughter to have an opinion like a machete that cuts right through the bullshit, to offend when backed in a corner and she knows she only has five seconds to turn into the attacker, just so she can walk away. So I tell my daughter, don't go for walks after dark, because darkness blends people into trees, slides forms against walls and careful of corners. You have got to walk wide around the corners and listen, listen to footsteps that match your own. So I've taught my daughter, if a look or a voice makes her skin crawl, if her gut is telling her to run, then run for your life, my girl. And she knows if she is ever harmed by another, I will hunt you down, do what I need to do, because I am her mother. I did not teach myself to feel fear for her. History taught me that.

Speaker 2 25:39

Tracey, I first heard you perform that at the Poetry at the Port, and as the mother of a daughter, it really blew me away. And so it's fantastic to hear you perform it again for us. Thank you so much. Like all of your poetry, it is really powerful and very relatable.

Speaker 3 25:57

Thank you very much. That means a lot to me, Kate.

Speaker 2 26:02

Thank you so much, Tracey. I'm loving our conversation. So let's continue with part two in next week's program. Our guest on Emerging Writers today was Tracey O 'Callaghan - writer, poet, storyteller, wordweaver, spoken word performer, and fitness instructor. And before we go, a special thanks to New Vision Australia radio volunteer Matthew Erdeley for editing this interview. This programme is produced in our Adelaide studios and can be heard at the same time each week here on Vision Australia Radio, VARadio on Digital, online at VARadio.org, and also on Vision Australia Radio podcasts, where you can catch up on earlier episodes.

Speaker 1 27:06

Thanks for listening to this Vision Australia Radio podcast. Don't forget to subscribe on your preferred podcast platform. Visit varadio.org for more. Vision Australia Radio. Blindness. Low vision. Opportunity.